1. Borowitz Report: Some Fear Ebola Outbreak Could Make Nation Turn to Science →

    In interviews conducted across the nation, leading anti-science activists expressed their concern that the American people, wracked with anxiety over the possible spread of the virus, might desperately look to science to save the day.

  2. The TSA really doesn't like it when you take your Nobel Prize in your carry-on →

    "They’re like, ‘Sir, there’s something in your bag.’ I said, ‘Yes, I think it’s this box.’ They said, ‘What’s in the box?’ I said, ‘a large gold medal,’ as one does. So they opened it up and they said, ‘What’s it made out of?’ I said, ‘gold.’ And they’re like, ‘Uhhhh. Who gave this to you?’ ‘The King of Sweden.’ ‘Why did he give this to you?’ ‘Because I helped discover the expansion rate of the universe was accelerating.’

  3. the real reason why it's called windows 10 →

    if(version,startswith(“windows 9”)

  4. xkcd: Watches

    xkcd: Watches

  5. Rob Ford Drops Out Of Toronto Mayoral Race →

    Just a matter of time before he ends up in a van down by the river.

  6. Artist Draws Whimsical Illustrations Over The Shapes He Sees In Clouds

    Artist Draws Whimsical Illustrations Over The Shapes He Sees In Clouds

  7. Vin Diesel names Vladimir Putin to the Ice Bucket Challenge →

    I really want to see Putin do that. Well played Mr. Diesel.

  8. Rick Perry 2016 is pretty much over before it started

    There 3 reasons why Rick Perry’s chances in 2016 are over. He’s been indicted for abuse of power. He’s failed to attract any positive attention from the GOP establishment. And I can’t remember the 3rd.

  9. Sharklumbo Is the Detective We Didn't Know We Needed →

    Kevin Pollack’s Peter Falk impression makes this whole thing work. Also, this take on Columbo’s classic “One more thing” bit is spot on. I guess it might be NSFW if you don’t like extremely poor CGI violence.

    Worth watching. Funny or die is what SNL should be.

  10. Christie: I Would Bring Traffic Over the Border to a Standstill →

    Testing the political waters in Iowa today, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie said that if he is elected President, he would bring the flow of illegal immigrants over the U.S.-Mexico border to a virtual standstill.

    Andy Borowitz will be here all week. Try the veal.